sadness Category
Tuesday, January 26th, 2010
Pernell Roberts Jr, who played the introspective eldest son of wealthy rancher Ben Cartwright on the hit TV western “Bonanza” and went on to star in medical drama “Trapper John, M.D.,” has died. He was 81.
Roberts was known for his activism, which included participation in the Selma to Montgomery marches in 1965 with Martin Luther King Jr in a campaign for voting rights for blacks; and pressuring NBC to refrain from hiring whites to portray minority characters.
Articles:
‘Bonanza’ Star Pernell Roberts Dies at 81
Pernell Roberts, last star of TV’s ‘Bonanza,’ dies
Wikipedia, Pernell Roberts
Pernell Roberts, 1928 – 2010
Tags: Pernell Roberts Jr
Posted in anger, Cancer, Fallen Warriors, sadness | No Comments »
Tuesday, January 26th, 2010
This one is especially hurtful… she battled for 5 years… stage 3 breast cancer, metastasized to her bones… like me…
Jennifer Lyon (37) former CBS reality show Survivor contestant. Lyon was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2005, the same year she finished fourth on Survivor Palau. She subsequently began blogging about her disease and treatment (JenniferLyon.com).
On January 19, 2010, Jennifer died from the cancer, which had come back from remission and had metastasized to her bones. She is the first cast member of Survivor to die.
Articles:
CBS News: “Survivor” Contestant Jennifer Lyon Dies
ABC News: Former ‘Survivor’ Contestant Lyon Dead at 37
Wikipedia, Jennifer Lyon
Jennifer Lyon, 1972 – 2010
Tags: CBS Survivor, Jennifer Lyon, Survivor, Survivor Palau
Posted in breast cancer, Cancer, Fallen Warriors, sadness | No Comments »
Sunday, January 24th, 2010
Robert Mosbacher Sr., a Houston oil multimillionaire who served as U.S. Commerce secretary under his close friend, President George H.W. Bush, has died at M.D. Anderson Cancer Center. He was 82.
Mosbacher died after a yearlong battle with pancreatic cancer.
Articles:
ABC 13 Local Houston
Wikipedia
NY Times
Robert Mosbacher , 1927 – 2010
Tags: Robert Mosbacher Sr.
Posted in anger, Cancer, depression, Emotions, Fallen Warriors, frustration, sadness, scared | No Comments »
Wednesday, January 6th, 2010
When I heard of this loss today, I just cried and cried. I did not personally know Shawn Felty, but – despite his own battle with colon cancer – he went out of his way to donate to my fund, and to offer words of encouragement. I sent a “Thank You” as I truly was grateful, but I did not keep in touch with him. I have let my battle overshadow the fact that I should keep in touch with the people who have reached out to me.
It is no excuse, it is simply fact. It is difficult when you are struggling to do everything yourself, everything by yourself, and are so tired by the end of the day, so tired by the beginning of the day, so tired to add more to the list… I will strive to do better… somehow…
“On December 13, 2009 at 4:30 pm, Shawn Felty passed peacefully surrounded by family and close friends. He was loved by many, with nearly 100 teammates, fellow actors, colleagues, cancer survivors, cancer fighters, Colondar models and friends visiting him over the last few days. For two years he battled this disease with incredible strength and extraordinary grace and he was inspiration to all who knew him. The world lost an amazing man today, but he left behind a perfect example of perseverance, fortitude and friendship.”
Shawn’s Blog: All It Takes Is Guts – please read Shawn’s writings, he Truly was an Amazing person.
Shawn Felty, 1969 – 2010
Tags: Shawn Felty
Posted in anger, Cancer, Fallen Warriors, frustration, sadness, scared, tired | 2 Comments »
Saturday, January 2nd, 2010
Once again,
I’m trying
to put on a
new face
a
mask
A smile
to
fool
myself
to
fool
the
world
this might
help
if I actually
got out of
my pajamas
but they are so comfy
and I am
so tired…
Tags: New Year, New Year 2010
Posted in Coping, depression, Emotions, frustration, loneliness, sadness, tired | No Comments »
Friday, January 1st, 2010
So…
After declaring that is was
time to
stop
the whining
I went and
fell right back into a
pitiful state.
Its Tough
Its a Tough situation
This situation
This cancer situation
Tough on
The Body
The Spirit
The Emotions
Its a Tough
time of year
This time of year
Tough
on the emotions
Tough
on the heart
Its been a Tough year
This past year 2009
I have
Lost
A Love
My Health
A Job
a Tough year
I’m not so tough
not so
Tough to be able
to carry this burden
without
cracking
at sometime
or another.
All I can do is
pick myself back up
dust myself off
put on a smile
keep on going
Tough it out.
Tags: Christmas 2009, New Year 2010
Posted in depression, Emotions, sadness, tired, venting | 3 Comments »
Thursday, December 31st, 2009
Spending New Year’s Eve alone as well.
Like Christmas.
alone.
Had two Friends ask what I was doing
After I asked them
And then felt bad
or trapped
when I said that I would be
alone
and didn’t know what to say or do
so came the
“obligatory” invites
to join them
in their festivities
that did not include me
One Friend – an old Friend from high school and his wife
Already planning to celebrate together, privately
Offering to include me
beforehand
How kind to care
I’ll pass, Thank You.
The other Friend – a Family celebration
She has just gone through surgery
And still in pain and disabled
Offering to include me
Despite her own struggles
How kind to care
I’ll pass, Thank You.
The obligatory comment from my Mother
Wish you were here..
but not
don’t worry about your dogs
just come be with us.
Nothing else
No party
no gathering
no small get-together
Nothing
No one should be
alone
at this time
One should be with Family
or Friends
Should be.
Not the Holiday I thought I would be having
Not the way that was planned
Not the way that was planned with another
Broken all around.
Still sad
but getting used to it.
Bring in 2010,
It has GOT to be better than 2009.
But then I said that about 2008 into 2009
and it just got worse.
Much worse.
I’m scared
and alone.
Tags: Christmas 2009, Cliff Grimes, Clifford F Grimes, Clifford Grimes, Dallas, Mr. Sack, New Year, New Year 2009, New Year 2010, New Year Eve
Posted in Emotions, sadness, scared, Special Days, tired | 1 Comment »
Saturday, December 26th, 2009
The “Season” is over.
The commercials on TV are
No longer
about Christmas
No longer
about the celebration
No longer
about the joy.
No more Merry Merry
Loving Family
Happy Couple
Smiling Children
It’s almost as though
a switch
was flipped
a marketing switch
was flipped.
Which is fine
with me.
Right now
This moment
In time
it is
too much for me
the pain is
too much for me
So flipp the switch
and I will cope
much easier
It will be
much easier.
Tags: Christmas 2009, Clifford Grimes, Mr. Sack
Posted in Coping, depression, Emotions, frustration, loneliness, overwhelming, sadness, tired, venting | No Comments »
Friday, December 25th, 2009
Ho Ho Whatever.
Here I am at home alone.
I’m going back to lay on the couch.
Maybe cry a bit more.
Tis the season to be jolly…
Tags: Christmas 2009
Posted in Coping, depression, Emotions, heartbroken, loneliness, overwhelming, regret, rejection, sadness, tired | No Comments »
Thursday, December 24th, 2009
Another emotional roller coaster of a day.
The cold is settling in…
I feel it
in my body
in my heart
in my soul
I feel it
I will be glad when this season is over
When the festivities and celebrations have passed
When the joy is a blurred memory
When the memories of my hopes and dreams are
no more than dust
no longer shards
piercing my heart
I feel it
the cold front moving in
The wind is whipping up
The trees are blowing from side to side
I can imagine that it might even howl later
A fitting sound for my mood
I covered the plants in the front, but have not the energy to finish the ones in the back. I lost some in the last freeze, I can only guess I will loose more in this one. I no longer have the energy to do everything.
Depression sucks almost as much as cancer.
Merry Christmas Eve.
Tags: Christmas 2009, Cliff Grimes, Clifford F Grimes, Clifford Grimes, Dallas, Mr. Sack
Posted in Coping, depression, Emotions, frustration, heartbroken, loneliness, overwhelming, rejection, sadness, scared, Stress, tired | 1 Comment »
